Thursday, December 27, 2007

take it to the limit

The holiday quality family time culminated today in a shouting match over dinner, and now each family member has retreated to a different room in the house. Good thing Kimmy had already gone up to LA for the rest of her vacation, or it would have been a much louder affair. I assume that all families have their moments like these, where not having to be guarded means you eventually let everyone know when you're annoyed with them and you make no attempt to shield anyone from your grumpy moods. In my family, it means shouting about feeling unappreciated or feeling like someone is not listening to you. I think that amongst non-related friends, people make more of an effort to appreciate and listen in order to show they value the friendship, but within families, sometimes you forgo the formality because it won't change the fact that you're related. I'm not saying this is a good thing. I don't even know if this is true in anyone else's family because people usually don't talk about this sort of private emotional discourse. But my gut feeling is that every family, no matter how perfect or happy they look on the outside or at most times, has its quirks and disagreements and tense moments, because there are no perfect people and no perfect relationships. My point is that we should never feel like we're the only one with an imperfect family life, and these moments of irritation and anger don't preclude a supportive and caring family relationship. Perhaps it helps that I have a short memory and I won't be mad anymore by tomorrow morning.

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